I was little, and it was Christmas. After dinner, my grandpa called all his grandkids around him. I sat on his knee. He put his arm around me, and told my cousin to fetch a book out of the china cabinet. We knew which one--we had read it before. The entire dining table hushed.
It was the Christmas story. A story that amazed me then and still amazes me now.
This is the greatest story ever told--a story that has been told for centuries upon centuries and that will continue to be told into the eternities.
It's a story of a babe who was born and laid into a manger. A story of a babe who grew up to become the Savior of the world. A story that changed the fate of the world forever. A story that gives meaning to my existence. It's a miracle- the biggest miracle of all. It's this story. You've heard it before.
Luke 2:4-14
4) And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)
5) To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
6) And so it was, that while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
7) And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
8) And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
9) And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
10) And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
11) For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
12) And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
13) And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
14) Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
I still remember feeling like I was part of something bigger. I remember blowing the candle out on Jesus' birthday cake. I remember being completely happy. I still am. I've been blessed.
O Holy Night is probably my favorite Christmas song. This arrangement is quite different from the traditional one, but I love it. It's still so hopeful, so joyful, so wonder-filled.
For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace. -Isaiah 9:6
I could have stopped you, maybe, but You seemed hurried, and I move slow. Real slow, and I needed to breathe. I've been a little thinner lately. Did you know?
Because you've brought me low, you did. And I've brought you low, I did.
I scribbled scrambled thoughts across my bedroom wall Once upon a time back then. My dear, if you really saw this If you could have only seen this- Heart of a dreamer and soul slightly flawed. But it's a long ways to fall In the dark in the sand. And I'd have to tell you that I understand.
And you've brought me low, you did. But I've brought you low, I did.
To those times when I've done it right But did it wrong Healed scars and intrinsically sad smiles Old letters and postage stamps A way when back and a time ago long Ended up in some song because
To me, you never seemed Quite so lonely As you did then To me, I never seemed Quite so lonely As I did then.
My dad was waiting for me at the airport, like always. I don't know if I know anybody more dependable than my dad is. My dog, who is now blind, still recognizes me by my voice and smell. I've arm-wrestled with my little brother on multiple occasions. He won the first time--and then it was a tie. I'm not sure how that thirteen-year-old got to be as tall as I am, but he is. My little sister has made me an entire ensemble of cotton ball jewelry, which I wear proudly, as well as colored me countless pictures, written me lots of unintelligible notes, and has consistently stuck to my side almost the entire time I've been home. The pantry is full of delicious food and I've eaten my weight in my mom's egg rolls. I'm going with my dad to pick up Jon from U-Mich on Thursday.
I went to Holland today for a dentist and orthodontist appointment. In between appointments, I took a walk around downtown Holland.
That place was magical when I was a kid. It still is, but in a different way. It's changed a bit. Or maybe I've changed a bit.
Anyways, just walking around that place made me smile. So many great memories. I went into JP's, ordered myself a mug of their famous hot chocolate, a cup of corn chowder, and took it to the bar at the window. I people watched, just thought, and wrote a bit. I took my own sweet tme.
It's been a while since I've been able to do that. At school, I usually have so much going on that I'm always multi-tasking or in a hurry. I feel like the greatest thing about being home is time. Time with the ones I love most and time to rejuvenate myself.
The next day of Thanksgiving Break was Thursday. Thanksgiving Day.
I spent the first part of it doing homework. Then we all went over to Isaac's in-laws. And then we stuffed. It was a HUGE Thanksgiving dinner. I wish I had taken pictures of the food as it was beautifully prepared, but alas, pictures are not a first priority when it comes to eating Thanksgiving dinner.
After dinner we went to see the new Twilight movie haha. No shunning. It's a family tradition apparently--to go see a movie after Thanksgiving dinner. And while I'm not the hugest Twilight fan, I still enjoyed it. Obviously, it had its flaws...and there was this one part (maybe a couple parts) where I just wanted to laugh out loud. But hey. Let's be real. There are parts like that in most chick flicks.I'm not going to hate on it just because that's what everybody seems to be doing.
On Friday, we went to Santa Cruz and visited the beach!! I walked into the Pacific ocean and it was magnificent. And really really cold. So much fun.
Sea Lions!!
change, yo.
After we had finished the beach, we drove back home, with a stop for a delicious lunch at a little diner. We went home for a bit, where I worked on my Spanish research paper.
That night, we went to the Oakland temple. It was a great experience, especially right after Thanksgiving. Such a blessing.
so beautiful.
After doing some temple work, we walked around outside. Since the temple is on a hill, we could climb the stairs to the second story of the temple, stand at the balcony, and just stare off at the huge expanse of city. I've already expressed my love towards the city in another post, so I'll spare you here haha.
Anyways, we drank hot chocolate, ate doughnuts, and got some authentic Mexican food before heading home. Mhmm.
The next day (Saturday) we went to the Muir Woods, the redwood forest! Holy cow, was this place beautiful. Absolutely took my breath away. And I think it was here I realized how much at the same time I absolutely loved being out of the city and in the middle of nature. Whatta paradox.
We headed back to home, eating Korean tacos on the way. Such good fusion food. That night we went back to the temple to see it all lit up for Christmas. I <3 Christmas so much.
We got ice cream afterwards, at another notable ice cream place. We had to wait about twenty minutes to get a table. It was called Fentons. You know, the ice cream place in Up [oh, so so cute].
epic sundae.
And that was the end to Saturday night. We left for Provo, UT Sunday morning. What could have been a boring, lonely Thanksgiving break in Provo turned into something exciting, new, and so much fun, thanks to Sarah and her wonderful family, and I'm extremely grateful for that.
Now I'm at home for Christmas break with my own family, and I'm loving it more than ever. It feels so good. Every bit of it. I love traveling, seeing, living, and experiencing new things...and at the same time, I'm realizing more than ever, how wonderful it is to have a place you can call home.
Well, I had every intention of writing about San Francisco way back when...and then school happened.
But now that it's Christmas break, and I'm home, and with some extra time to spare--here goes!
Sarah (a co-worker from the Quality Assurance Lab) and I left for San Fran on Tuesday afternoon. We drove with her sister-in-law and the boyfriend of said sister-in-law. We finally arrived somewhere around 2:00am, I believe. Very long, and for the most part uneventful. There was a beautiful sunset, or so I'm told, because I was very much asleep for that part of the trip. Ever since my Europe adventures, I've been able to sleep almost anywhere, and cars are no exception.
We were staying with Sarah's brother and his wife, and as we prepared to go to bed in the living room, Isaac (Sarah's brother) informed us that we were leaving for San Fran at ten in the morning.
So the next morning, we woke up, ate breakfast, and then we all went to San Fran. Isaac's in-laws are incredibly kind, generous people, and they showed us around. And the rest of the post will most likely be more pictures than words, seeing as how a lot of the pictures kind of speak for themselves.
First, we went to the Golden Gate Park, which is HUGE. Apparently, there is a man who hangs around the park, dresses up like a bush, and makes his living scaring the crap out of people. I kind of wish we could have run into him.
Then we made our way over to the coastline. So beautiful.
After we had explored for a bit, we headed over to see the Golden Gate Bridge and a bit of scenery.
Isaac, Sarah, and baby Aiden (Isaac's baby). SUCH a cute kiddo. Such nice people.
And then we made our way to the big city itself.
Someday I'm going to live on the top floor of that red apartment.
Lombard street!! aka the most crooked street in the world
We went to Ghiradelli Square! Mhmm mhm delicious.
free sample of peppermint bark. favorite thing ever.
i don't even usually like peppermint.
tis a good thing that ghiradelli square is so far away.
no matter how tasty the very berry sundae is, there is no way a college student can
afford a $8.95 sundae every.single.day.
After we had gotten our sugar-fix for the day, we walked to Fisherman's Wharf. SO PICTURESQUE. Seriously.
1) part of the wharf
2) clam chowder in a sourdough bread bowl. SO GOOD. Surprisingly good, considering that
seafood and I are just getting over the "I hate you" stage of our relationship.
3) looking back up at the city from the wharf.
After we had walked up and down around Fisherman's Wharf, we headed for the cable cars. This was a great idea: 1) it took us all over San Fran in a short period of time, 2) it showed us San Fran at nighttime, and 3) it was an absolute blast. Hanging off that cable car was ridiculously enjoyable.
bryce, mandy, me, and sarah.
We had a little bit of time to shop and look around, and then it was time to head back.
We had dinner at Isaac's in-laws' place, and it was absolutely delicious. Salmon and risotto with scallops. I know, more seafood. What kind of person have I become?!?
We came home. And that was the end of the Wednesday of Thanksgiving Break.
About being done with my last physics class? Or the finishing up of finals week? Or the new car I just bought? Or the going home for Christmas TOMORROW?
Let me tell you how I feel.
I feel just like this:
Even the fact that I have to do cleaning checks+pack+finish grading all these papers tonight...
doesn't change the fact that life couldn't be better right now.
At least, that's the picture so far. The lack of snow is a little disconcerting. I'm still not sure whether to be thrilled or sad about that one. Whatta doozy. It makes Christmas feel like it's still a long ways away. But judging from the way my facebook newsfeed blew up this morning, there's definitely snow in Michigan now. Good good good.
Regardless of the fact that it's more of a winter wasteland here than a winter wonderland, I have a plethora of reasons for why I love the month of December anyways, in no particular order.
1) All the trees in the JFSB quad. They're all lit up, and they make walking home from the library in the wee hours of the morning much more enjoyable.
2) Christmas music. Need I say more? Seriously. Listen to this gem. You've got to be a regular old Scrooge if this doesn't make you smile even a little bit. My It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year Pandora station is what gets me through finals. #rockingaroundthechristmastree.
3) Tim Tam slams (Hot chocolate. Bite off opposite corners of Tim Tim. Use Tim Tam as straw. Pop in mouth once it starts to melt.). Sounds strange, but I don't know how I didn't discover these until this year. Needless to say, I will never forget sitting in Rob's kitchen with the Cambridge folk as we all tried one. So decadent. Casi transcendental.
pretend that's hot chocolate and not coffee.
you get the idea.
4) Ugly sweaters. I bought two in England, specifically for this time of year. You bet they're ugly. You bet I love them. They are shapeless and do your figure no favors, but they're warm and comfy and colorful.
5) Christmas trees. We don't have one in our apartment, but there's a plethora of them all around campus. So festive.
6) Reason for the season. I love reading the Christmas story, especially around this time of the year. I also love Christmas hymns. Christmas is a beautiful time of the year, if only because Christians all over the world are taking the time to remember, commemorate, and worship Christ.
7) Nice people. Seeing the Salvation Army people ringing their bells always makes me smile. I think people are more cheerful in December. More service-oriented.
9) Family. I love my family and family time. December is usually the only time I get to visit home, with the exception of a couple days during the summer (sometimes). There's nothing like turning into ye olde familiar driveway and seeing my dog run towards the car. My house is dab-smack in the middle of the woods, surrounded by huge pines covered in snow. It's clean and beautiful and home-y.
10) Accomplishment. For me, December also has this feeling of accomplishment. Finals get done somehow. A semester of learning has just been completed--a semester of class, work, and service. The year is almost over. Usually, I like to keep my focus future-forward. December is a little different. I like that feeling of looking back and seeing how many steps I've taken as opposed to how many I have left to go.
Well, Spanish and chemistry are practically screaming my name. Time to get back to work. Eight days until I am home.
As I sit in the library, staring blankly at the coordination chemistry chapter in my hefty chemistry book and with a to-do list of 134920394 things running through my mind, I think-
There's only eleven more days before I'm on a plane, headed for home. How bad could eleven days be?
In other news, here's my new fave artist. This here dude, Trevor Hall, reminds me of Bob Marley. And I'm not talking just about the dreadlocks.
In a matter of two phone calls within twenty minutes of each other this past week... summer 2012 was made.
I've been crossing my fingers for a summer internship for a long time. I thought the chances of me getting a solid internship this year were rather slim because I still have not taken any of the core food science classes yet. This year my goal was just to try to get as many interviews under my belt as possible. The practice with the interview process would be good, if nothing else.
A couple weeks ago, I applied for a position as a research and development intern at Land O'Lakes. I made it past the first interview, and a second interview was set up. Tuesday at 3:30. They would call me.
It was 3:25 on Tuesday and I was sitting on my bedroom floor, literally shaking from nervousness. I couldn't sit still. The phone finally rang and I scrambled for it desperately.
"Hello, this is Emily," I said, making an effort to sound as professional as possible.
And the interview went from there.
On Wednesday, I got good call #1. It was Nick from Land O'Lakes, offering me the internship. I couldn't believe it. I could have screamed.
Turns out, I'll be in Minneapolis, Minnesota, from the beginning of June to end of August. I'll be working in the research and development facility. It pays well. The area looks beautiful. And plus, I'll be needing a car. So I'm buying a car! I'll be driving out there from Provo. Hellooo twenty-hour road trip. By myself. But I'll have a car. And a great internship with a solid company. I cannot wait.
As soon as I got off of the phone with Nick, I saw that I had a new voicemail. It was from Jeff, telling me to call him back because he had some really great news.
Jeff is heading up a student-led trip to Zambia this spring. I've been planning on going ever since he told me about it. We'll be working with Scholarships for Zambia. A group of 6-8 of us students will be bringing and distributing medical/educational supplies, teaching classes, and setting up a micro-loan program. The thing is, all of this takes money. We needed to raise at least $10,000. I had no idea how we were going to do it, so it's been something that I've been praying about.
I called Jeff, and thus, good call #2 commenced. We got a $10,000 grant from a foundation.
I literally had no words. I was ecstatic. This is HUGE. I mean, I've been learning about Education in International Development all semester long. Our 20 page group paper is about education in Zambia. This is something I'm passionate about. $10,000 might not look like much when you're looking at the entire country, but in terms of the lives it will happen to touch, it will mean the world.
I'm lucky enough to be in San Francisco this Thanksgiving. And while it's not like home and while I still have hours of homework ahead to be done this weekend, I have been loving every minute of it.
Yesterday we spent the day travelin' around the city. And what a beautiful one it is. Urban and natural. More conservative me in a liberal place. Old and new. So many amazing moments&things.
Of course, we went to the ocean. The part of the San Francisco beach that we visited was rocky. We stood on the ruins of bathhouses built in the 1920s and crossed our fingers that none of the waves would be quite high enough to touch us.
The sea has always appealed to me. Something about how wild it
is on the surface and so infinitely peaceful underneath.
Later that day as I was hanging off a cable car, with the wind whipping in my face and the sun settling into the crevices between the skyscrapers and the uneven roofs of quaint colorful flats, I knew that I loved the city. Not San Francisco, in particular, but the city. You know what I mean? I love the hustle and bustle, the vitality, the heritage, the stories, the diversity, the culture, the individuality.
so anonymously personal.
I don't know if I'd live in the city indefinitely, but I can see myself living there for a couple years. Maybe after I graduate with my master's, I'll move to the big city and rent myself a little flat and work. And after a long day of work, I'd either stay in with a couple friends, or I'd go out with a couple friends. [running, art-appreciating, shopping, reading, walking, writing, snuggling, thinking, eating, traveling]. Either way, it'd be brilliant.
Anyways, I'll write more about San Francisco and what we did later.
You know how I made that goal to finish Mere Christianity? Well, it's such a small book that it really shouldn't be that difficult at all...except for I keep forgetting about it. Nonetheless, it's a good one, and I'm almost there. Here's a little thought from that book, in honor of Thanksgiving.
"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. Probably earthly pleasures were never meant to satisfy it, but only to arouse it, to suggest the real thing. If that is so, I must take care, on the one hand, never to despise, or be unthankful for, these earthly blessings, and on the other, never to mistake them for the something else of which they are only a kind of copy, or echo, or mirage. I must keep alive in myself the desire for my true country, which I shall not find till after death: I must never let it get snowed under or turned aside; I must make it the main object of life to press on to that other country and help others do the same."-C.S. Lewis.
There's no way to possibly list all my blessings. So I'd just like to say that I'm grateful for all my blessings, especially in the context of the bigger context. I am extremely thankful for all the little things, but hope that I never get so caught up with life that I begin to lose myself in them. I mean, after all, Thanksgiving is a time to not only remember your blessings, but to also remember the giver of those blessings.
Happy Thanksgiving!
P.S. Family gets a special mention. You are the greatest.
But every time I go to the salon...I leave with hair much shorter than first intended. It's even more obvious when your hair is pretty short to begin with.
shaggy to short...er.
Also, it's really hard to find motivation to study for a chem exam two days before Thanksgiving break begins.
Especially when you know that your professor is going to drop an exam.
Some man answered and introduced himself as Nick. I was confused because I couldn't recognize his voice, and then I missed part of the conversation, and then somehow I thought he was a telemarketer.
And I was thinking, How do these telemarketers get my cell phone number?!?
Point of story: I almost hung up on the guy offering me an interview for the internship I had applied for two weeks ago.
Every moment of light and dark is a miracle. Walt Whitman.
Allons! to that which is endless, as it was beginningless,
To undergo much, tramps of days, rests of nights,
To merge all in the travel they tend to, and the days and nights they tend to,
Again to merge them in the start of superior journeys; To see nothing anywhere but what you may reach it and pass it,
To conceive no time, however distant, but what you may reach it and pass it,
To look up or down no road but it stretches and waits for you—however long, but it stretches and waits for you.
"There are moments when a man's imagination, so easily subdued to what it lives in, suddenly rises above its daily level, and surveys the long windings of destiny. Archer hung there and wondered."
-The Age of Innocence.
I feel like those moments don't come often. That they come in brief snatches-- caught up in that instant before you lose yourself to sleep or in that first blast of cold air as you open the front door. That second-to-last step before you reach the summit of a mountain, that strangely detached moment just as you knowingly let yourself fall. In the first caress, the last blow, right before you flip the light switch--on, or off.
It's a little scary hanging there. Maybe even scarier to wonder.
But exhilarating.
I find a piece to my puzzle every time one of those rare moments comes. When I was fifteen, I thought it'd be nothing more than a 25 piece puzzle. Now I realize that it's closer to one of those 5,000 piece ones. You know, the ones that sit on a coffee table in a basement surrounded by faded mustard yellow [or maybe floral] couches dating back to the seventies.
The idea that it might never get done isn't so bad though.
Is it weird that I'm a little freaked out about everything that's due this week and I'm blogging instead of doing my homework? Yes.
Is it weird that I've loved this song ever since I heard it as the credits of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe rolled (which incidentally happens to be the first movie I can remember ever seeing in theaters)? Mhmm...
Is it weird that every time I think about Europe, I want to go back for 'just a little bit longer' with all my heart and that I am insanely jealous that my roommate Haley is going to Spain for winter semester? Okay, definitely not weird to that one.
Is it weird that I'm obsessed with the same things as my roommate right now (namely, The Awful Waffle, The Next Iron Chef: Super Edition, and Chicken Amore)? Did you notice that all three of the above have to do with food? ha. Well, that's kind of weird, but not really.
Is it weird that the longer I'm away from home, the better it feels every time I go back? I don't think so.
Is it weird that I'm so anti-commitment? Probably, especially considering the fact that I'm living in Provo, UT, home of the fastest-made commitments you or your great-great-aunt have ever set eyes on. But here's the truth, I'm not. Really.
For a while, I wondered if maybe I was doing it just as a statement. You know, the entire shebang. I would sit through stake conference with my arms crossed whenever they would talk about marriage and grumble about it to my roommate the entire way home. [Baaad attitude, yes. Ya lo se (pretend there's an accent mark over the 'e').] I would also laugh at things like "tie/shoe dates" and roll my eyes at things like the "date box" or grow slightly hysterical at the thought of a "dating committee" alongside the "Sunday school committee" and get a little close-lipped around the entire "obligatory-date-a-week" conversation topic. And, to top it off, the entire 'Could you be the one?' dating mentality is SO awkward for me. And that's not because I'm a hopeless romantic who hopes that someday a modern-day Gregory Peck is going to spontaneously appear, and then all of a sudden, we'd be in love, and then we'd get married, and then, we would live happily ever after (take that back, who doesn't want a modern-day Gregory Peck?).
And then I realized it's not just a statement. It's just who I am right now. To be honest, who I am right now was probably shaped by a plenitude of things, like past relationships, travel, family, religion, friends, culture, and lotsa self-reflection. Because here's the thing. I'm independent. I hate being pressured. I hate feeling like I'm obliged to do something. I like living. Not saying that marriage isn't living. Not at all. But I like living right now. Not for the day that I'm married. I feel like my current existence is not only 'not that bad,' it's fantastic.
I'm not even 21 yet. So maybe I'm a little naive in saying that I hope I'll never be 'searching' for 'mawwiage' (Princess Bride, anybody?). But I still have lots of goals to fulfill and cosas to do, and right now I want those things so much more than I want to be married. I don't want to be searching for something I don't have or can't find and most definitely can't hurry up. I'd hope that instead--every day I would be breathing in the moment and living a fulfilling life, regardless of whether I'm single at 20 or single at 30. Regardless of whether I'm married in two years or fifteen years. And I just don't know if I can fully live in the moment if I'm always focused on the future. I mean, last winter semester, when all I could think about was how I couldn't wait until that semester was over, I wasn't the most positive person to be around. I was happiest when I was thinking in the present, like I had to do when I was with Brady, the coolest autistic kid I've ever met and a definite spark of sunshine that miserable winter.
Those things that I want to do? Well, I'm going to do every one of those things and keep making up new things to do until I meet somebody who is so right that he's more right than all the right things that I want to do. If that even makes sense. I'm kind of restless as a person. I like to be moving on to new things all the time, making new goals, being busy. For me to be happy, I know I can't give up my hopes and dreams and aspirations. I know myself better than that. So instead of me giving up my hopes and dreams and aspirations, the person I marry has to become and be my hope and dream and aspiration for the rest of my life. The thing is, you just don't stress about that until it happens, and it happens when it happens, in its own sweet time.
I'm not saying screw the future. Obviously, you're supposed to prepare. But that preparation has to come from you wanting to be a better person because you owe it to God and to yourself. You've got to find yourself before you can really find anybody else, and I'm serious about that. So in a perfect world, we wouldn't be asking "Are they the one?" but "Am I the one?" And if we weren't, we'd try to be the one, not for them, but for us.
Back to what I said about hoping I never find myself 'searching' for marriage. Well, the concept of love finding you sounds so cliche. But in my limited experience with life and God, I know that there's a mission that you're destined to fulfill. And at the end of the world, I want to be able to be unafraid. When I see the Savior, I want to be able to tell him that I did my best to find that mission and accomplish it. That's what you need to be searching for and that's when you'll be the happiest. When real love's a part of that equation, the factors and fractions and confusing parenthesis and logarithms in the way will simplify themselves, and I'd like to believe that you'll know that that's what the Lord wants at that time for you. Actually, I know that. And until that moment happens, you can't allow yourself to fool yourself into settling for anything less.
Okay. I'm done. Awwwkward.
[As an aside, as soon as I'd posted this blogpost I was so embarrassed that I deleted it soon after. So why is it up here again? Well, I figured someday I'd go back and read this blog and I'd find this post in particular highly amusing. And then I could drink hot chocolate by the fireplace and be all nostalgic about the good old days when I thought I knew everything.]
To my little sister or to whoever reads this blog in the future, that was a bit of a nonsensical rant to myself and maybe a eensy-teensy bit of advice for you, seester. Sorry about that. But Evelyn, you know I've been living in Provo for...going on three years now. And if you're old enough by the time you read this, you probably knew this rant was going to come sometime. And if you happen to end up out here as well, darling, I bet it will have changed a tad, but not too much. And I bet you'll dig it most of the time, just like me, but that you'll have your moments. Because right now, judging from how loudly you can protest when Jeremiah doesn't let you do something, you're probably even more independent and opinionated than I am.
I didn't even know why I was making myself work so hard over the class.
For some reason, I thought classes for my international development minor were going to be a cakewalk. Thus far, I'm only one class into the minor, but in that one class so far I have over 35 pages of single-spaced 11.5 font work. That's like a 70 page paper. And the class isn't even done yet.
Well, all the work's paid off.
My super-intimidating, my knees-shake-a-bit-when-I-talk-to-you, please-don't-call-on-me professor just asked me to be his research assistant.
I could be passing out from fright in his presence, and I'd still take the job. Research having to deal with international development with a respected professional in the field? Don't mind if I do.
I'd been missing my keys for over a week. After being locked out of our apartment multiple times, I was on the brink of paying $50 to rekey the door...and then I found my keys. I proudly took my keys to school with me...and then in my EDLF 362 class, I realized I was missing my phone. I crossed my fingers, closed my eyes, and hoped to high heaven that I'd left it at home.
Thing was, I knew I had had it in my hand as I was running up the stairs at 7:58 that morning, trying to get to my 8:00 chemistry class on time. Of course I made it- I always do. That didn't help the fact, however, that I seem to have a penchant for losing anything of value that I own.
Just as I was telling myself how smart I was to pay a little extra to get insurance on my phone, I got an email from my dad telling me that the Lost&Found people had called him about my phone. Even though I didn't make it to the Lost&Found office before it closed, at least I know where it is now. Thank goodness for all the honest people at BYU. :)
In other news, my physics test (aka bane of my existence) is this week. I have a ticket home for Christmas (oh JOY). I'm thinking about going to Africa (Dear parents, I'll call you about this. Promise). I'm applying for internships. Writing a 15-20 page group paper (good group=good group project experience. Thank you to whoever was watching out for me up there on that one). Watching foreign movies at the International Cinema (often leaving mildly but happily confused). Still keeping up with Modern Family (no judging- it's hilarious). Meeting with professors (intimidating). Always catching up on life. Always busy. But loving it most of the time.
Life just works out. It's great.
P.S. Donated blood today for the first time since that one time I passed out in the hallway of the Wilk. I was so nervous that the nurse asked me if it was my first time, even though I clearly had the red sticker on, which meant that I'd donated before. I spent my morning drinking my weight in water and my afternoon eating the package of free cookies I got and the whole deal went without a hitch. See, Mom? No cause to worry.
P.P.S. It was snowing this morning around 7:00. I know it's November and all...but no. Not ready for this. Snow's only welcome when I can play Christmas music and I can't play Christmas music until the day after Thanksgiving.
I wore the same thing I wore to the first Cambridge Bop--namely, a white blouse, sweet leather vest, a green headscarf, wood earrings--and called myself a hippie.
I left a half hour later.
Because the entire time, I was thinking, "This is lame sauce compared to the Bop."
And because nobody was dancing.
And because I had been far more in the spirit of Halloween when I had been decorating ghost/pumpkin shaped sugar cookies with my roommate, carving pumpkins with Cambridge folk, and getting lost in a corn maze (where I was scared multiple times for free).
So yes, I left. And I went grocery shopping instead.
I think that means I've become stingy with my time. Or maybe I didn't want to have to call tonight a total sunk cost (I've been hanging out with one too many economists lately?), or maybe I need to stop comparing Provo dance parties to European dance parties, or maybe...
I think I'm starting to become a boring adult. WHAT.
In other news, I cut my roommate's hair today so that she could be Spock (Star Trek). She doesn't just look like Spock, folks--she is the feminine version ofSpock. It's that good.
Sometimes I want to take on the world. As in, ace all my classes, work a ridiculous amount of hours a week, get a research position, do the Honor's program, read the New York Times over breakfast, figure out my thesis, run a marathon, read poetry in my free time, eat healthy, apply for 3495 internships, fulfill church callings, be an amazing friend, go to activities, participate in clubs, and the list could go on forever.
And sometimes I get a little tired of that. Sometimes, all I want to do is sit on the couch, watch movies, and eat pringles. And because I can't, I procrastinate and sit around and get on facebook and wander pointlessly throughout the week. Mostly because I can. And because I forget how good it feels to be the best I can be.
Sometimes you need something to shock you out of couch potato mode. I got that shock today.
That's it, I'm off cruise control mode now.
Sometimes it takes failing a test to get you ready to pass the course with flying colors. And I'm not talking just about classes here.
General Conference weekend is over.
And with that...
An Einsteins bagel bucket is demolished.
Two pints of Ben and Jerry's ice cream....gone.
Haley and I have been having a really healthy weekend here, obviously.
But more importantly, this year's conference was incredible. Temples in Wyoming, the Congo, South Africa, Paris, Columbia, and wait, a SECOND temple in Provo?!? Out of the Provo Tabernacle, no less. Blew my mind. There was an audible gasp from the conference center...we could hear it on the tv from our apartment.
I loved Dieter F. Uchtdorf's talk on Saturday afternoon--his talks are always inspiring and comforting. Robert D. Hale's talk this morning on trials and the importance of "waiting upon the Lord" was also a fave. As well as Dallin H. Oaks' talk on Christ. The one that made me go "ouch" the most was Ian S. Arden's talk on using time wisely and managing distractions. Yeah...need to work on that one.
I made dinner tonight. It's been something I've been wanting to make for a while. Stuffed tomatoes with garlic, pancetta, and garlic. And whole wheat pasta. Yum.
before cooking.
after.
It was delicious.
Tomorrow Haley and I are starting a diet of sorts. An eat-healthier (you mean eating outside of the bagel and ice cream food groups? yes.) and regular exercise sort of diet. Don't laugh now.
